My son Kenny was born to earth on a Saturday, January 23 1982 at 12:52AM and born to heaven also on a Saturday, August 7, 1999 at 10:52PM. Kenny was only on earth for 17 years, 6 months, 2weeks and 22 hours, but in that short life he gained many friends. I met some wonderful teenagers AND adults during those four days in August 1999. Thank you all. There were over 500 people who came to say goodbye to my son, and stood online for over an hour in the heat and rain.
To each and everyone I thank you forever with all my heart and love.
I WILL FOR ALL MY LIFE REMEMBER MOST OF WHAT HAPPENED ON AUG.7th 1999...
Kenny got up that Saturday morning and took a shower then went to the store for breakfast for us all..."I bought You Smacks Mom" he said when he came back (They were my favorite cereal)He ate then went off to work,He was working in a bagel shop not to far from our house. He got off at 4 and he was home by 4:30,We were supposed to go to the movies together (Me ,Ken & my Daughter Buffy)...
Ken came home in such a great mood because he just found out that he got "the full time hours" (it was between Ken and another worker)...He wanted to go out and celebrate with his friends
(Harry & Brian met Kenny at his job)...I said ok he could go with his friends because we could go another time (I have wished a billion times since then that I had said NO we already have plans,We R Going To The Movies)...When Kenny was leaving to go with his friends he said "I'll make the burgers when I get in tonight Mom,I brought home rolls and croussants(*S) for us to eat with the burgers)...
We talked about what time he was coming home at... I wanted him home by 12:00 he wanted to stay out till 2:00("it's Saturday Mom and I'll be with my friends and We are celebrating my getting Full Time Hours" Ken said looking at me with his beautiful olive green eyes) I said OK and we agreed on 1:00 am.
As he was walking out the door (@ aroung 5:00) I had such a strong feeling to stop him, follow him, Hug Him(I found out a short time later that his sister felt the same way and she watched him walk down the street with his friends) Kenny borrowed money from me and his sister so he could stop and eat while he was out (promising he'd pay us both back after he got paid)...I did call him back for a hug & kiss but I should have stopped him...I wanted to see him walk up the street, but I stayed in the house "Cuz His Friends Were Waiting" ... Kenny called me around 8:00 to let me know he was going into the park with his friends and I said thanks for letting me know... At around 9:00 my daughter called to let me know she was at a friends house and would not be home till 12:00,She said she would call if she were going to be later...
At around 10:20 pm I started to have a terrible feeling, A dreadful feeling that something was terribley wrong,I kept praying that my children were ok,safe,I was walking back and forth in a complete panic,I remember looking at the clock and it was 10:40, I could "FEEL" something was wrong with Kenny,by 10:45 I was completly out of my mind and
Pleading not just praying anymore to PLEASE BRING THEM BOTH HOME SAFELY TO ME...
I finally layed across the bed drained and looked up and said Please take care of my son,Bring him home please,I leave it in YOUR Hands (to GOD I prayed),I slowely sat up and looked at the clock , It was 10:50...
I was taping a Roy Orbison special on TV for Kenny and my brother Buddy (it started at 11:00pm) and I started cleaning my room to make myself busy. My nephew Danny came knocking on my door and said we have to go,"you have to come with me Aunt Cathy Kenny got hurt" Danny said. There are so many details of that terrible night, everything is still so clear,even after all these years,I don't think a parent EVER forgets,It's like the night our children were born Every Detail is remembered forever.... Riding to the spot where my son was hit by 2 cars took only minutes,It was only about 5 blocks away, climbing over the rickety fence with the help of 2 young men, one standing on one side of the fence and the other on the other side. I remember begging the police officer, "Please let me on the ambulance with my son." The ambulance was so dark. They had the inside light off and my son was in there in the dark. The cop telling me, "He's dead." and asking me, "Why was he crossing the highway?" My answering him, "Because Ken was 17." That was my only thought. "Because he was 17."
"Why do You wear a Police uniform everyday of your life KNOWING All The Dangers? My son was still just a boy of 17"...Walking away from the back of the ambulance(and the dumb cop...Not All Cops Are Dumb,But I was unlucky in ALOT of things that night) thinking I could climb in the back of the ambulance if I went in through the front, picking up pieces of Kenny's chain, seeing Kenny's blood.
A puddle of my son's blood on the curb of the highway, kneeling down near his blood and putting my hands in it, thinking that if I drank my son's blood I could bring him back to me. Licking his blood from my hands, hoping and praying to God for him to not really be gone from me.
The insanity of the entire thought that my son, my baby,
he was only 17 and he was never coming home to me again. Putting my hand lightly back into Kenny's still warm blood because I wanted to save him and in my mind at that moment I thought I could give him life again if I held his warm blood...I just wish the cop would have let me hold my son in the ambulance,Just let me on the ambulance with Kenny...9 years have passed but somethings NEVER Go Away... so much and so many things happened that will stay in my mind and heart forever...
The terrible fact is my son took a commonly used "shortcut" crossing from Pelham Bay Park to Roberts Avenue, which looked deceivingly easy. He made it all the way across I-95 to the last lane where he almost reached safety, (Two steps from safety!) He was hit by 2 cars (the Bruckner Expressway/New England Thruway at that time it was a 6 lane highway, Now it's an 8 lane)... he was in the park with some friends, they decided to leave...That's when the "Shortcut" was decided...
the driver of the first car called for help right away; he saw what happened from his side view mirror. It was 10:52PM when the second driver hit Kenny(He first hit the side of the first car and fell to the ground) The second driver was tail gaiting right behind the first driver and it was the second car that killed Kenny, She thought at first it was a doll she said... the local police called it a "hit and run", but it was not.
Both drivers DID stop and were told by the local police to leave.
The highway police were wonderful, as was the coroner who called at 6AM to tell us that my son... well, it was instantly after the 2nd car hit my son... the head injuries were very severe. Plus both of Kenny's legs were broken,The right one had a compound fracture...Ken also had a few cuts and bruises all over his back and arms.
HELPED TO CHANGE SOME THINGS, THOUGH...
There is now a fence there. Right after Kenny's accident I met another mother who also lost her son Daniel 8 months before I lost Kenny. Daniel took the same "shortcut" on December 25, 1998. Daniel was 21 years old and in the armed services. It was Christmas night and he walked a friend of his home (she lived in Country Club at that time) and took the same "Shortcut" Kenny did 8 months later to get back to the Roberts Avenue side.
When I met with Daniel's Mom, (she is a wonderful woman who just didn't have the same feelings I had, but we did share the same shocking grief. She believes in "free will" and that God gives us "free choice".
I don't feel the same about that.
I asked her if she would join me in a possibly long battle to have fencing put up to prevent others from doing the same as Kenny and Daniel and we found out Too MANY others also took the same "Shortcut" for Many Years...
Hilda, Daniel's mother, agreed to join me in getting fencing around the park and On And Around The Highway... Many people said "It Won't Be Done, They will never put a fence on the highway" many people told us... We now have a fence on the middle of I-95 (the Bruckner/New England Thruway). We were also able to get the assistance from many of our local politicians: Sen. Guy Velella, Bronx Boro Pres. Fernando Ferrer, Councilwoman Nita Lowey & Madeline Provenzano and many others who helped us, all of the members of Community Board 10 and James Vacca, who was wonderful to us. We had a "petition rally" on Saturday night January 22 (we were going to have a surprise party for Kenny on that night; he would have turned 18 on Jan. 23rd) and all of our local politicians showed up to support us. The biggest hurdle was the DOT (Dept. of Transportation). They didn't want nor did they feel a need to put a fence up, even though we not only lost our sons, but also were able to prove others were still taking that "shortcut". Finally, we got the fence in the middle of the highway ,we also accomplished getting 3,000 signatures from our neighbors in the Pelham Bay and surrounding area as well as all the politicians' signatures and we also got a fencing around Pelham Bay park.My wonderful family and dear friends never gave up,
They helped me and stuck with it all the way through, Thank You Guys,
I Think You all Know WHO YOU ARE....
For now, the only thing that brings me a little peace is the knowledge that my son Kenny did not die in vain. I know he is in heaven with so many of my loved ones
He still "visits" me and my family often, and I know he is still helping me when I really listen. But the pain and missing him just doesn't get any better...
I put Kenny and his dog Mystic in this picture from playing in PSP.
The background picture was taken by Kenny's sister Buffy in 2006 in Pelhambay Park by the water where Kenny and Buffy would often hang out ...
The above picture was taken August 9th 1999
(at my request) by my neice Patty~Jo...
Many people who knew Kenny said
"He was an old soul"...
My brother Paddy often said (even when Kenny was a little boy...and Pat still says it).
I remember a wonderful lady named Dale Dyer said to me during Kenny's funeral "Kenny was always an old soul,You knew that as soon as you met him...
His great big smile,the kindness he always showed others, His compassion for others,
His understanding and wisdom at such a young age...Everyone who met Kenny knew he was an angel...He was here too short a time... But that's how it is with angels, They are never here long,They are only meant to be here a moment...Kenny's feet never touched the ground, You were blessed to have an angel, Even if for a moment my friend."
I wrote these words down as quickly as I could knowing at the time I might forget them...
When Dale said this to me I was hurting and so angry that my son was taken from me,
But now I TRUELY KNOW and Understand what Dale Meant...Thank YOU Dale for the comforting words of wisdom that now I'm beginning to better understand.
Kenny was always dying his hair different colors,Blue,Green,Purple and Red...He wanted to do it Blond so I did it for him...
Please Be Warned...The Next Picture
(below)Was Taken During Kenny's Funeral...
Some People May Not Want To
See Or Remember Kenny This Way,
But I Feel It Is Part Of The Story On This Page...
Thank You Susie Dunn ^Jason's^ Mom for this beautiful gift
and the wonderful opening header on these(9th Anniversay ) pages
"Float Near Me; Do Not Yet Depart!
Dead Times Revive In Thee:
Thou Bring'st, Happy Creature As Thou Art!
A Solemn Image To My Heart...
This Is How We Remember Kenny,
With A Big Happy Smile and a sparkle in his beautiful olive green eyes.
This picture was taken
in his sister Buffy's room,
They had such good times together
"Those Sunny Days Of Merriment
When Heart And Soul Were Free,
And When I Dwelt With Kindred Hearts That Loved And Cared For Me."
Extract from "The Bluebell"
by Anne Bronte(1820-1849)
I chose this song on this page because, although I listen to it often, at this time of year I do seem to listen to it more then usual...
I think It Just Fits here.
"Now I Lay Me Down To Weep"
Sung by Skeeter Davis
Now I Lay Me Down To Weep,
Count My Tears Instead Of Sheep...
Say My Prayers,Turn Out The Light
But I Just Lay And Weep All Night...
Now I Lay Me Down To Cry,
Pray The Lord That I Might Die
But Each Morning I Awake
And Listen To My Poor Heart Break...
If Only I Could Sleep At Night
I'de Dream That You Would Hold Me Tight
But I Can't Dream If I Can't Sleep
So I'll Just Lay Me Down To Weep...
Sleep Won't Come To Crying Eyes
And My Poor Heart Just Can't Realize
That Now You're In Anothers Keep
So I'll Just Lay Me Down To Weep.
Sleep Won't Come To Crying Eyes
And My Heart Can't Realize
That You're In Anothers Keep
So I'll Just Lay Me Down To Weep.
I Just Lay Me Down To Weep.
On alot of my son Kenny's pages you will see many of these little"Post" from "Angel Winks"... I want to take this
Opportunity to Thank Angel...I Often use her post card shop because it's such a perfect place...Sometimes I just go and browse around...Click above to go and do some "Browsing",
It's Lovely There...